I was having a sleepover with my good friend Laura the other night and we crawled into bed. She looked at the blanket I had and asked if that was still the one her Mom had gifted each of us in our friend group in college. I said yes. Then, I told her the other blanket on my bed was a birthday gift from Dana, another close friend. She then asked about the third blanket on my bed… it’s a quilt made from all of my Dad’s old shirts. Technically, also a gift from the quilter and my mom for purchasing.
I then spoke aloud: “Is that a coincidence that all my blankets are gifts? The things that keep me warm and wrapped?” She said, “probably.” And I said, “probably not.”
She thought for a second and then wished to clarify… “Do you not believe in coincidences?” I said no.
Something I learned a while ago, mainly in grief, was that coincidences are simply not coincidences. We have coined that phrase to sum up energy patterns colliding, frequencies aligning, and divine connections blooming right before our eyes.
It’s bullshit.
If you haven’t already realized, I’m not talking about blankets anymore…
It’d be different if the word wasn’t being used to shrug off the supernatural. If we were resonating and pondering the meaning, and in turn, appreciating the word, I may feel different about its use.
We completely deface the magic by doing this. I think the meaning of coincidence should have, in a way, been kept sacred. As we all should know, words matter. The “coincidences” in my life I take as spirit guides. As big affirmations depending on what I see. As signs that I’m right where I’m supposed to be, or on the way.
You have a choice to lean in or shrug it off as a happenstance every time. What’s the fascination in that?
The more you step into the present moment, the more you see them all around you. Sometimes, they hit you in the face so hard you would have to try to convince yourself there aren’t other forces at work here. The more you cultivate your space with intention, the more you see personal patterns. The more you do that, the more you realize there is a lot going on that even our conscious human minds cannot comprehend.
This life is a miracle. The Earth that sustains us is a representation of God. Everything you touch vibrates back into the world sending endless ripples. It really is that deep.
A few of my most recent “coincidences”:
- I was looking for a new place to live. I wanted to buy a house but ended up having to rent. I walked into my current condo and immediately thought: “This is where I finish my book.” If that gut reaction wasn’t enough, all the cabinets were empty in the kitchen except for a lone hibiscus/Hawaiian mug in the first one I opened. Hibiscus’ have been a sign to all of my family members consistently for the last 4+ years. I have one tattooed on my arm. Check. I’ll be safe here.
- One of my friends introduced me to a guy who wants to put together a mini music festival at the place I work. We got on the phone and discussed. And, I ended up booking his band for an event my nonprofit is holding. Then, a different friend of mine introduced me to a womxn she thought I would connect really well with. It ended up that the womxn is the guy’s partner that I met earlier the previous week. Life is guiding me to this couple. I don’t know why but I will lean into it and trust. If I wasn’t consciously aware, I wouldn’t think much of it.
- I have been meditating on financial stability and the theory of Abundance within my own life. Yesterday, on a day where the distillery I work at is almost always routinely slow, I had a stellar day and made a lot of money. “Oh, but Ally, that’s just the service industry! It can be hit or miss!” It’s fine if you want to think of it that way.. But I don’t see the intention or purpose in those thought patterns. I’ll pass.
There are hundreds more….big and small…
You may never see the direct correlation to any of your own personal “coincidences” but that’s not the point.
And if you get me, you get me…. Everything matters SO much that nothing matters at all. Think about that and get back to me. Maybe I’ll explain it in a later post.
Coincidences, signs, and happenstances are your own doing. Everything is connected. Open wide.
Something I try to share with people when they’ve had a loved one transcend physical form is to pay attention to the world around you. These signs are everywhere and constant. Write them down. After a few years, you’ll have a literal bank of undeniable proof that they’re “still with you.” A phrase we also so nonchalantly like to pass around to sad people. It makes grieving just a little bit less hard. Do it.
Oh, and I kept the mug.
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